Embracing God's LOVE

I'm heard this concept today from someone. "How come it's so easy for me to feel the love God has for someone, but so hard for me to accept the love He has for me?"

I think I am relational to a fault. I love having deep conversations and growing with friendships. But my problem and my gift is that I see God in people. When I see kindness, I see God. When I see grace, I think of the gift of grace God gives. And then when I see hurtful things, it's really hard for me to separate those things from God.

God is love. And sometimes that statement blows me away and sometimes it's incredibly hard for me to grasp. I feel that I've been given love, but I also feel at times that I've experienced a lot of abandonment. And it makes me afraid of embracing God's love and grace because the love I have been "given" has been conditional. It makes me afraid that love and grace would be taken away from me. Like I'm unworthy.

But Romans 8 says NOTHING in life nor death. NOTHING in ALL creation can separate me from the LOVE of God. I can't earn it. I can't loose it. And His heart just aches and aches and aches for me to accept it.

I absolutely love this C.S. Lewis quote:
“Imagine yourself as a living house. God comes in to rebuild that house. At first, perhaps, you can understand what He is doing. He is getting the drains right and stopping the leaks in the roof and so on; you knew that those jobs needed doing and so you are not surprised. But presently He starts knocking the house about in a way that hurts abominably and does not seem to make any sense. What on earth is He up to? The explanation is that He is building quite a different house from the one you thought of - throwing out a new wing here, putting on an extra floor there, running up towers, making courtyards. You thought you were being made into a decent little cottage: but He is building a palace. He intends to come and live in it Himself.”

I love this quote because it's not one of those quotes about God will bless you with wonderful things. Of course He does, but I don't want to want things. I want to want God! In this quote, the blessing in the illustration is God Himself, living inside of me. And I really want to desire God immensely and find Him as enough. Anything more is not necessary, but an incredible gift.

Something I see as an incredible gift:  I love seeing God's grace with my best friend Joy Dean and seeing the journey of our friendship over sixteen years. I see God's consistency because I can't ever remember not knowing her. I see a lot of hurtful times, but I see so much grace. I see Joy as a witness to God's joy through her smile and her ways of loving people.

I'm thankful for that. And I want to be a reminder to her and her to me of God's character but also to push each other to seek Him first. That's who I want to be as a person, a witness of God, giving His love because I have accepted it.

And to add onto the song I posted from Mumford & Sons... Not only was I made to meet my Maker, I was made to know Him, to love Him. God didn't NEED me. He didn't Have to make me. He WANTED me. He's enthralled.

I'm confident in His enthralling Love. Confident that I can't ever loose that love because I never earned it in the first place. It's the most beautiful, incomprehensible, unexplainable gift.

The way you invest your love, you invest your life

I just love this song a lot...


Lyrics to Awake My Soul by Mumford & Sons :

How fickle my heart and how woozy my eyes
I struggle to find any truth in your lies
And now my heart stumbles on things I don't know
My weakness I feel I must finally show

Lend me your hand and we'll conquer them all
But lend me your heart and I'll just let you fall
Lend me your eyes I can change what you see
But your soul you must keep, totally free
Har har, har har
har har, har har

awake my soul...
awake my soul...

How fickle my heart and how woozy my eyes
I struggle to find any truth in your lies
And now my heart stumbles on things I don't know
My weakness I feel I must finally show
Har har, har har
har har, har har

In these bodies we will live,
in these bodies we will die
Where you invest your love,
you invest your life

In these bodies we will live,
in these bodies we will die
Where you invest your love,
you invest your life

awake my soul...
awake my soul...
awake my soul...
For you were made to meet your maker

awake my soul...
awake my soul...
awake my soul...
For you were made to meet your maker
You were made to meet your maker

___________________________________

Every time things have become hard for me, I just have this desire to quit. But I don't feel that. I feel life. I feel the commitment I made to so many things in my life that the change that needs to occur is God changing something in me, not changing things around me. I feel  awake. And I want to invest my love, my life in something important.

Our Daily Bread's article from today. Author- Albert Lee
"Wonderfully Made"

When I was a child, someone close to me thought they could motivate me to do better by frequently asking me, “Why are you so stupid?” I didn’t know how much this had affected me until I was a teenager and heard someone behind me say, “Stupid!” At the word, I quickly turned around, thinking he was talking to me.

Knowing Jesus Christ as Savior and Lord helped me to realize that because God created me in His image (Gen. 1:27), I’m not stupid but am “fearfully and wonderfully made” (Ps. 139:14). God declares that all He has made is “very good” (Gen. 1:31), and the Psalms remind us that we are “skillfully wrought” (Ps. 139:15).

The psalmist David describes how God knows each one of us intimately: “O Lord, You have searched me and known me. You know my sitting down and my rising up; You understand my thought afar off. You comprehend my path and my lying down, and are acquainted with all my ways” (vv.1-3).

Not only are we wonderfully made, but because of Christ’s death on the cross, we can also be wonderfully restored to a right relationship with God. “If anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation . . . . All this is from God, who reconciled us to Himself through Christ” (2 Cor. 5:17-18 NIV).

In His own image God created man,
He formed his body from the dust of the earth;
But more than that, to all who are in Christ
He gives eternal life by second birth. —Hess

Each person is a unique expression of God’s loving design.

In the heart of Christ

I feel as if I am falling in love with God for the first time.

I'm spending a summer in about the most beautiful place. Every day I've been spending an hour on my lunch break hiking up to a new favorite spot in the mountains and just sitting in His presence. I've had this overwhelming thought for the last couple weeks as I've been looking at the mountains, thinking "God made these mountains. He made them and said they are good. I am amazed by them." And then it hit me last week. God made man and said he was very good. If I can be so incredibly amazed by the beauty of the mountains, what stops me so often from seeing how God made me?

Sin.

I spent last semester confused and stuck in the thought of what in the world does it mean to have a relationship with God? So many Christians say "it's not about religion. It's about relationship" But what in the world does that mean?

And it's been hitting me through so many things this week. Maybe it's from the time I've spent in his creation or by myself or hurting over some of my own struggles.

The book- Embracing the Love of God by James Bryan Smith is totally changing me. He said in the chapter about embracing God's forgiveness: “When I was focused on not failing, I invariably failed. I tried hard not to fall, but since falling was what I was thinking about, falling is what I did. Once I began to experience God’s forgiveness, I quit looking at sin and started looking at God”

Turn from sin and turn to CHRIST! That's what the message of the gospel is all about.

I can't for a second claim perfection. Since I became a Christian, I have been so focused on how do I make people see Christ in me? How can I change their opinions from the girl they knew before Christ? It hit me that I've never really asked HIM to show Himself through me. I'm not saying I haven't been a Christian, but I feel like I haven't really sought after knowing God- truly, truly knowing Him.

When I have an issue to work through, it's important to work on it, but I can't do it on my own. I can't spend all my time pondering how to fix it, how to have the right words, how to change a situation. All I can do is focus on the heart of Christ.

What does that mean? Just like the quote from James Bryan Smith. I can't dwell on myself. I can't focus on failing/ not failing/ how to fix a situation. God desires my surrender. He desires my complete dependence in Him. And God knows we have sin. He knows we are not perfect, but He pushes us and challenges us and yet never leaves because He is God and therefore is consistent.

Completely consistent.

I am worthy of being loved simply because I am a child of God. I'm worthy of being shown grace because He has paid the highest price to give me grace.

I've been inconsistent, but I am loved by a consistent God. I've done hurtful things, but I am forgiven by the all graceful God. I've acted in impatience, and yet I've been waited upon by the all patient God. I've sinned, and yet I am completely treasured by the all-kind God.

I want to be in His character. I want to know Him to give His character to other people, not with the intent to make people see me as a better person, but to point people to CHRIST! I want to be out-pouring of the love that only comes from God in acting in grace, being more consistent, forgiving, patient, kind.

I want to be defined- completely shaped by Him.

And if God chooses to give me Himself and nothing more, I want to be content.

I want to fall in love with Him so much that even though I would experience pain, I would be content in His heart alone.

Reflections

I'm reflecting tonight on God's consistency. I'm thinking of the companionship He gives as I choose Him and choose His way. My pastor always says the Christian life isn't a hard concept. It's living it out that is the hard part. 

At the end of every school year I tend to think through a lot of things of where I have been and where God has brought me. It gives me the chance to evaluate myself and thank God for the example of His character to study.

Reading in Ephesians tonight I see the life of Christ's character being outlined as He shows Himself walking in love, not allowing Himself to be partners with the world. I'm amazed by the consistency in Jesus' life with the will of God. 

My deepest desire is to reflect the character and love of my Lord. I have no excuse for messing up in my walk with Him and yet I have, but I'm praying these words to penetrate in my heart tonight. 

^{Ephesians 5:1-20}

¹ Follow God’s example,^(A) therefore, as dearly loved children^(B) 2 and walk in the way of love, just as Christ loved us^(C) and gave himself up for us^(D) as a fragrant offering and sacrifice to God.^(E)

³ But among you there must not be even a hint of sexual immorality,^(F) or of any kind of impurity, or of greed,^(G)because these are improper for God’s holy people. ⁴ Nor should there be obscenity, foolish talk^(H) or coarse joking, which are out of place, but rather thanksgiving.^(I) 5 For of this you can be sure: No immoral, impure or greedy person—such a person is an idolater^(J)—has any inheritance^(K) in the kingdom of Christ and of God.^[a](L) 6 Let no one deceive you^(M) with empty words, for because of such things God’s wrath^(N) comes on those who are disobedient.^(O)7 Therefore do not be partners with them.

⁸ For you were once^(P) darkness, but now you are light in the Lord. Live as children of light^(Q) 9 (for the fruit^(R) of the light consists in all goodness,^(S) righteousness and truth)¹⁰ and find out what pleases the Lord.^(T) 11 Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds of darkness,^(U) but rather expose them. ¹² It is shameful even to mention what the disobedient do in secret. ¹³ But everything exposed by the light^(V) becomes visible—and everything that is illuminated becomes a light. ¹⁴ This is why it is said:

“Wake up, sleeper,^(W)
    rise from the dead,^(X)
    and Christ will shine on you.”^(Y)

¹⁵ Be very careful, then, how you live^(Z)—not as unwise but as wise, ¹⁶ making the most of every opportunity,^(AA)because the days are evil.^(AB) 17 Therefore do not be foolish, but understand what the Lord’s will is.^(AC) 18 Do not get drunk on wine,^(AD) which leads to debauchery. Instead, be filled with the Spirit,^(AE) 19 speaking to one another with psalms, hymns, and songs from the Spirit.^(AF) Sing and make music from your heart to the Lord, ²⁰ always giving thanks^(AG) to God the Father for everything, in the name of our Lord Jesus Christ.

If you Believe

            An old man sees a beautiful twenty-year old woman. He has been sad for the last fifteen years after loosing his wife and many close friends. “She will make me happy,” he thought. He prayed to have this woman. If he prayed hard enough, he believed he could have this woman. Matthew 21:18-22 relates to what this man believes as verse 22 says, “If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer” (NIV). Prayer deals with submission of oneself to God in the purest form. This old man is not following what God intended in this passage as it relates to prayer. There are many things this old man has wrong.

            The book of Matthew was written by Matthew, an ordinary sinner and tax collector. He was transformed by God and called one of Jesus’ twelve disciples. He writes mostly to the Jewish reader to provide an account of Jesus. He provides information about Jesus’ birth, John the Baptist, Jesus’ ministry, His death, resurrection, and ascension. His focus is mostly on Jesus’ teaching through his parables and metaphors (Quest).

            One of these famous metaphors shows up in Matthew 21:18-22. Jesus walks with his disciples, spots a fig tree that had no fruit, and tells it to die. The disciples wonder what this is about and Jesus explains that if one has faith he can do more than bear fruit. He speaks of this faith and prayer a person can use to do anything.

            Matthew 21:19, “Seeing a fig tree by the road, he went up to it but found nothing on it except leaves. Then he said to it, “May you never bear fruit again!” Immediately the tree withered” (NIV). Immediately. The Message Bible says the tree “withered on the spot, a dry stick”. A tree, like faith, grows slowly in order to produce good fruit. Once a tree begins to die, or a person doubts, it serves no purpose. A person cannot be used to further the gospel without faith. The Bible Knowledge Commentary wrote about faith and doubt saying, “Jesus used this event to teach a lesson in faith, for if they had genuine faith in God they not only would be able to do miracles…The Lord was teaching the importance of faith rather than doubting or simple marveling. By contrast the nation of Israel had failed to exercise faith in Him” (Walvoord). God requires full belief, which serves a full purpose, not doubt or lack of producing fruit.

            Furthermore, verse 22, “If you believe, you will receive whatever you ask for in prayer” (NIV). If you believe. The Amplified Bible words this verse, “having faith and (really) believing” (Amplified). Belief, or “real belief” is added to this prayer, which goes beyond a week “bedtime prayer” that many participate in. Matthew 17:20 can help the reader understand this belief. “He replied, “Because you have so little faith. I tell you the truth, if you have faith as small as a mustard seed, you can say to this mountain, ‘Move from here to there’ and it will move. Nothing will be impossible for you” (NIV). Believing a person can move a mountain takes a lot of “real belief”. Belief, or this kind of pure belief, is not rooted in itself. It is through belief in God, that this “mountain-moving” kind of belief is possible. The Wycliffe Bible Commentary writes about this passage saying, “This kind of faith, however, will only ask those things that it knows to be God’s will” (Pfeiffer).

            The old man that desires a twenty-year old woman is not seeking God’s will. He follows his desires and prays for what he wants. He does not ask God if he can have this woman, but rather demands that God will give him this woman. The old man has another problem. He has been depressed for many years and seems to be looking to this woman to fix his problem by making him happy. He is not seeking God first. If his desire were fulfilled, there’s no telling if he would seek to love God with what he has been given because he can’t serve God with what he was originally given.

The Life Application Study Bible provides insight on Matthew 17, saying, “The power of faith is illustrated by its ability to remove this mountain…Scriptural faith is a trust in God’s revealed Word and will. Hence faith to move a mountain can be exercised only when God reveals that to be his will” (Life). In many situations God allows individuals to have others in a romantic way, but in a God-fearing relationship, the individual must ask what God’s will is before he begins to ask for what he desires. A Godly prayer, also known as the Lord’s Prayer, is outlined in Matthew 6: 10-14. It begins saying “Our Father in heaven, hallowed be thy name, your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven” (NIV). For the desires of man will change as he recognizes and commits himself to God’s desires and will.

            The statement in verse 22 of Matthew 21, “If you believe” is significant. It says “if you believe” not “if you desire”. It does not simply state, “Pray”. Believe and pray.

            There are two stories surrounding this fig tree metaphor in Matthew 21. The story that precedes it is Matthew 22:12-17. In this story, Jesus overturns tables and expresses his frustration with people selling sacrificial animals outside of the temple. Jesus says in verse 13, “My house will be a house of prayer, but you are making it a den of robbers” (NIV).  He proceeds to heal a blind man is praised by children. When children are mentioned in the Bible, they are often shown for their faith. One example is in Matthew 18:3, “"Truly I say to you, Unless You turn around and become as young children, you will by no means enter into the kingdom of the heavens" (NIV). Matthew includes this segment about children to lead into another passage about faith.

            The passage following the metaphor of the fig tree is Matthew 21:23-27. This is where Jesus’ authority is questioned. Many authoritative figures question what gives Jesus the authority to perform miracles and such. Just like man cannot move a mountain on his own, Jesus must have faith in God. This passage outlines the power of God and the need everyone has to submit to him in order to do his will.

            The metaphor of the fig tree lies about two-thirds of the way through the book of Matthew. This is one of the later lessons of Jesus. Many stories surrounding this one follow the same theme of faith. It foreshadows faith that needs to come later in Matthew and becomes more and more important as Jesus’ thoughts and actions reveal his submission to God’s will. In Matthew 26: 39 Jesus prays, “Going a little farther, he fell with his face to the ground and prayed, “My father, if it is possible, may this cup [of death] be taken from me. Yet not as I will, but as you will” (NIV). Jesus’ will aligns with His father’s.

            The New Testament has been viewed by many as a delightful form of literature. Every passage is organized in a poetic way. The metaphor of the fig tree is no different. Just like a student writing a paper to explain an idea: the metaphor is stated, questions are asked, and the metaphor is explained. Then, faith is talked about and foreshadows the faith that comes about further in Matthew, this constant surrender.

This passage speaks many volumes about God. He is all-powerful as he is the enabler. As an individual believes in him, he is able to move mountains in God’s name. Matthew 21:21 says “Jesus replied, “I tell you the truth, if you have faith and do not doubt, not only can you do what was done to the fig tree, but you can say to this mountain, ‘Go throw yourself into the sea” (NIV). Humans choose to be faithful, but they must choose to be faithful to God, proving God is the enabler, the all-powerful one. In the passage following the fig tree passage, Jesus shows that God is the enabler by saying “John’s baptism--- where did it come from? Was it from heaven, or from men?” (NIV). He doesn’t straight out say he has his authority from God, but from the fig tree passage, the reader can infer it is saying God is the omnipotent one.

God listens to an individual’s requests. Verse 22 in Matthew 21 says a person can receive whatever he asks for in prayer through his belief. Furthermore, Philippians 4:6 states, “Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and petition present your requests to God” (NIV). By God asking people to present their troubles and desires to Him, He is making Himself available to listen, and he does.

This passage also reveals God as a transformer. He changes hearts. In verse 21 of Matthew 21, Jesus says a person, in his belief, can tell a mountain to move and it will move. The faith a person initially has changes to a stronger faith that can move these mountains. Likewise, the passage Matthew 14:22-35 shows this kind of transforming faith. Peter, one of Jesus’ twelve disciples sees Jesus walking on water and walks on the water to meet Jesus. After walking a little ways, he becomes afraid and begins to sink as he begins to doubt. This is one form of transformation. Peter does not allow Jesus to transform him as he sinks into the water. When he chooses to believe; however, he is able to walk on the water. He is transformed by God to do something that is scientifically impossible. God transforms others all throughout history. Take the author of this book, Matthew for example. He was once a tax collector, hated by much of society, and was transformed into one of Jesus’ disciples. He went on to write about this great faith.

This passage speaks volumes about people as well. Jesus uses a fig tree in his metaphor and compares people to this tree. This tree has the potential to produce good fruit, but it does not. People have the potential to do unimaginable things things, but when they doubt they wither away like this fig tree.

Hebrews 11:1 says, “Faith is being sure of what we hope for and certain of what we do not see” (NIV). God is an omnipotent, omnipresent, and omniscient God. He is not always around in a physical sense or present in ways people expect him to be, but he calls individuals to trust him anyway so our desires can be aligned with his desires.

God calls people today to have faith, just like he called Peter to walk on water through faith. He enables people to have in faith in order to prevent them from withering away. It takes a lot of faith to believe in a Jesus that existed many years ago, but he asks that people will believe in him in the different ways he will work today, so they and others they will influence can trust him in what is to come.

An old man, desiring love and affection can find it through Christ. He may not feel loved in a physical or expected sense, but his desires can change with the purity of his heart. The all-powerful God can make him desire to pray for this young beautiful woman. He may seek to be a fatherly figure for her and show her God’s love. He may be transformed through God’s love. If he has enough faith. If he prays earnestly with a pure heart. If he listens to God’s will. If he has belief beyond what he can see with his human eyes. And this passage foreshadows something else that came true in the end of Matthew and continues to be proven today: God exceeds expectations.

Works Cited

Life Application Study Bible: New Living Translation. Carol Steam [sic], IL: Tyndale

House, 2007. Print.

Pfeiffer, Charles E., and Everett F. Harrison. Wycliffe Bible Commentary. Moody, 1980.

Print.

Quest Study Bible NIV. Grand Rapids, Michigan: Zondervan, 2003. Print.

Walvoord, John F., and Roy B. Zuck. The Bible Knowledge Commentary. David V Cook,

1989. Web.

He is Able

He is able to do immeasurably more than all we ask, or imagine, according to his power that is work within us (paraphrase from Eph 3:20)

All I can say is how amazed I am in the way He provides, even when I have allowed myself to become anxious at times. But He is the God who provides beyond what I can think to ask or imagine.

Roxanne Engstrom, a family friend of mine, is a missionary in Africa, has just experienced something she would never hope to. Her husband and children were electrocuted and are alive to tell of God's saving grace. Roxanne said while she was waiting on hearing if her family was ok, "I was forced in this all to count the cost, to say to my Jesus I do not count anything as loss compared to you". She really put into perspective all the things I get anxious about and the beauty of the gift of peace God gives.

Here is her post:

http://lilmonkeydays.blogspot.com/2012/04/i-have-no-clever-or-semi-witty-line-to.html?m=1